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Breast Cancer Survivor |
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Gloria |
I
was diagnosed on January 23, 1998, when I went into the hospital
for what I thought would be an outpatient procedure for an
excisional biopsy. I had had one two years prior for a
lump found in my left breast, except that time it was benign.
This time I did not wake up in the recovery room but in a
hospital room. My husband was in a chair close by my
bedside and within a few minutes of waking my surgeon came in
and told me that news, "We found a little cancer."
I was too groggy at that time to grasp the full impact of the
news, so I just closed my eyes and went back to sleep for
another hour or so. When I awoke later, my husband
was still there and again the surgeon returned and asked if I
had any questions at this time. I didn't. Not now.
All I wanted to do was go home. I felt an ache in my chest
and left arm and touched myself wondering if my breast was gone.
The next few days and weeks were spent meeting with doctors and
searching the internet for any and all information on breast
cancer. I was like a sponge, devouring all the information
I could get. I had to know everything. To me,
knowledge is power. I got copies of my path report, my
films, blood tests and doctors notes and took them with me as I
met with three different medical oncologists to find out
what the next step in my healing would be.
I found out that my lump was small (1.1 cm) and that 18 of 18
lymph nodes removed were all benign. All three
oncologists, however, recommended chemotherapy and radiation
followed by five years of tamoxifen. I began my treatments
with Dr. Yee, a confident, compassionate, no-nonsense oncologist
and hemotologist with a terrific sense of humor. I
selected Dr. Yee of the three, because she let me ask a ton of
questions and she patiently answered all of them. She even
gave me a homework assignment. I liked her immediately.
She sensed I needed information and that's what she gave me.
Lots of stuff to read and learn.
I had four rounds of Adriamycin and Cytoxan administered by her
chemo nurse in a office with a comfortable reclining chair,
video equipment and plenty of magazines to read. I knew
ahead of time what to expect, possible nausea and definite loss
of my hair. As it turns out, however, I never got sick
because I got great anti-nausea meds prior to each chemo.
And in my research and reading I learned a lot about supplements
and vitamins to keep my blood counts up. With Dr. Yee's
permission, I took a lot of supplements, and I believe they
helped me tremendously.
Following my four rounds of chemo, which ended the day before my
stepson's wedding, which I attended wearing a gorgeous wig of
flowing black hair, much like my own had been before chemo, I
met with Dr. Z, the radiation oncologist. He and his staff
of nurses and technicians were wonderful, caring and funny.
I got marked and tattooed for radiation treatments--35 in all,
and began rads about 6 weeks after my last chemo.
In the interim, I discovered a group of women on an AOL breast
cancer board who quickly became my online support group.
We became "breast cancer sisters." I use to keep
a list by my computer of their real names and screen names so I
could keep them straight. Finally, as I learned how to
create a webpage, I added their names, ages, locations and dates
of diagnoses to the page and shared it with them so we could
keep track as more and more women joined the board. I even
gave us a name--"Just Us." We were an exclusive
group. We had breast cancer in common and our own
language, our own warped sense of humor. We really
connected and developed love and friendship with one another.
The Just Us gals helped me as no others helped. When I was
down or sad or scared, there was always one or another sister
online to hold my cyber hand and lend a cyber shoulder to cry
on.
I also began taking tamoxifen in July 1998 along with my
radiation treatments and I experienced tremendous hot flashes
and I finally hit bottom and was crying all the time. I
couldn't concentrate at work. Yes, I worked throughout all
my treatments, only taking off on Fridays for chemo, and leaving
early every day when radiation treatments began. But, it
all caught up to me emotionally, and I saw a psychiatrist who
diagnosed me with clinical depression and put me on Effexor, a
mild anti-depressant, which also helped to minimize my hot
flashes. I took two months off work to concentrate on me,
on getting well and finishing the last two weeks of my radiation
treatments.
Life was starting to get back to normal and the gals from the
Just Us online group made plans to meet. We came from all
across the US to meet in West Chester, PA. There were 30
of us at that first meeting, and it was one of the most
rewarding and emotionally charged 4 days of my life. I had
made some wonderful friends who helped during my darkest days.
Now almost four years later, many of those ladies are now
angels, having lost their battles with "the
beast." However, our Just Us sisterhood endures.
We have had meetings in Florida, Las Vegas, New York, Palm
Springs, San Antonio. Who knew that breast cancer
would open up a whole new world of friendship for me.
Now, I and many of my Just Us sisters reach out to help others
who are newly diagnosed. We are all now warrior women.
We have survived, thrived and live our lives like there is no
tomorrow. We live for today!
Please visit my webpage for information and inspiration.
Just
Us - Breast Cancer (The List)
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