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Breast Cancer Survivor |
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Vicki |
My dear Aunt Constance
was dying of cancer. I didn't have time to give much thought to
this little irritating 'thing' under my right breast. Surely it
was only an irritation from the under wire of my bras. I was too
consumed with losing my wonderful Aunt to be so bothered; and,
certainly it could not be cancer. Beautiful Aunt Constance
passed. I still paid no attention until 5 months later. It was
becoming more than an under wire irritation.
In November 1997, the mammogram showed the Radiologist that it
was carcinoma. The pathology report from the biopsy said no.
When I went for my follow-up mammogram in April 1998, I told the
doctor that I had to get rid of this because it was beginning to
be painful. Though it was just a cyst that had to be removed. He
scheduled a surgical biopsy. Who knew what news that sunny
Tuesday in April 1998 would bring?
I began, early, making numerous calls to my surgeon on that
fateful morning--he was with a patient each time I called. Late
afternoon the phone rang and his "Hello Vicki, how are
you" somehow told me what I certainly did not want to hear.
The pathology report did reveal carcinoma. My world stood still
as I bravely asked all the questions I could possibly think of
during those frightful minutes. I cannot remember any of the
questions except the one I think is the most important.
"What stage is it?" He explained it was probably Stage
2. Later to find out after the lumpectomy, it was, in fact,
Stage 1, with no invasion to the lymph nodes. What a
Blessing!!!!!!!
After hanging up, I ran to our garden area, which is surrounded
by woods and screamed, hollered and cried and demanded to know,
"Why me, Lord?". As I was crying, a calmness came over
me and it was as if the Lord said, "Why not you?". I
didn't understand this message from Him until much further down
the road. I cannot say that having experienced Breast Cancer did
not carry with it a lot of horrible emotions. IT DID. I was on
an emotional roller coaster ride. At times I still am. I
sometimes awaken in the middle of the night or when I'm lost in
thought, think that it all was a nightmare.
Cancer has taught me to appreciate all the things in life that
we so often take for granted, for example, the beauty of our
glorious, West Virginia mountains.
I am married and the mother of two wonderful boys, ages 11 and
7. Yes, I was a late bloomer. My first son was born at 37 and my
second son at 41. So you must know that I had to fight this
battle with a vengeance. I know God did not give me these
beautiful gifts at such a late age not to be able to see them
grow into progressive, upstanding young men.
I firmly believe this was God's way of sitting me down
momentarily so that I could realize that I needed to be about MY
FATHER'S BUSINESS.
As Gilder Radner so aptly stated, "HAVING CANCER IS BEING A
MEMBER OF A CLUB OF WHICH I'D RATHER NOT BELONG". But,
since I am a member of the club, I have learned to head my
membership in a positive direction. In June 1998 I was reading
the local paper and came across RELAY FOR LIFE, the American
Cancer Society's signature event. The rest is history. As I
became quite the activist, is when I understood God's message of
"Why not you?". 1999 I was our county's Relay For Life
Chairperson; as I will be in 2000. I am on the ACS's Board of
Directors, chaired our Breast Cancer Awareness Fundraiser in
1998 and 1999. One of the most fulfilling rewards has been
seeing the funds I've helped raise come back to our community.
This journey has been an incredible learning experience for me.
The most important being that the Battle was not mine, but the
Lord's. As a 49 year old, almost two year survivor, there is
much joy and hope after breast cancer. No test no
testimony!!!!!!!!
- Vicki
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